Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
i love that when i tell my kids and grandkids about how we first met it will be about this little thing called a "poke" on facebook
Stop trying to talk to my friends!!
then get some ugly ones...
Tortellini makes me feel like I'm eating hundreds of little vaginas
hes the hot one from work who thought i was dead after my party
His roommate left already and took the beer pong table so we had to take off his bedroom door. Maybe res life won't notice.
He called it restless penis syndrome. I call it cheating.
We can't be fuck buddies. You stare into my eyes while we fuck.
I swear to god little potato creatures live inside Belvedere bottles and claw at your throat as you swallow shots.
we're the same shoe size and he owns more pairs of heels than i do. this could be the beginning of a beautiful friendship
Again. I'm very sorry I tried to poke your eye out. You've been aware of my inability to aim since day one.
Hell no. Last time I used a Slip N Slide I ended up with bruised ribs, a broken fence and the hatred of a half naked girl with a sprained wrist.
We power houred with shots of red wine. Somehow we ended up with 7 bottles and lost Chris. Trying to find him this hungover is proving very unsuccessful.
Wait... so you had sex and then your ear drum ruptured? I'm not sure if I want to ask if the two are related...
Turns out dignity is priceless and Plan B costs $41.09
Randomize
