I'm drinking in the hospital parking lot.
Nothing gets me like the O.C. theme song does.
Breakfast of vicodin and eggs out of a solo cup at about three in the afternoon on a wednesday...I have my life together
You say "arrested with two drunk girls" like it's a bad thing....
i went to throw her on my bed and threw her straight in to my bike
if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
I think it might be brain cancer. Hangovers can't be this bad
What's the right thing to say when he sends me a picture of his penis ?
I saw a picture of my dad holding my legs in a kegstand. Town festival=success.
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
Great sex, the promise of us mixing our excellent genetics in the future, and access to drugs are mainly what's holding this relationship together at the moment
I have accepted that I am a sexual predator. What I can't accept is the lack of sexual men for me to seduce in this town.
Had a dream I went to Disney to visit you and then I got really drunk and puked all over these little kids in line
My cat took a shit on the guy who passed out in the bathtub
Ok next time we are filming it. You bring the camera and I'll buy more socks
Randomize
