whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
i need to break up with him. i realized this while i was making a mental grocery list while we were having sex. this is not the first time i've done that.
Well he told me I'd never be a wizard, and so I responded with you'll never have a big penis. After that we both just sat there and cried.
Hey couldn't find water bottle to put margs in whole bottle in purse gonna stop and get cups and ice from starbucks and burrito from una mas want a quesadilla
I think being an adult is being able to say no to free shots...I need to work on that.
I'm in a bed full of sand, and also just took my contacts out. Whatever happened yesterday was great, I think.
We were banging then all I remember is coming down hard and smashing my top teeth off his forehead. I just rolled off and tapped out. Done-zo
I feel horrible. I brought her to your house like a late night pizza delivery and dropped her off.
He said he wanted to sit next to the fountain so he could "watch the water hit the other water".
Can someone please remind me later tonight that there's a taco in my purse. I may get drunk and forget I put it there
My dad told me I would need to be my mom's DD tonight. So, that's how my Easter weekend is going down.
Okay I'm ready to show you that my weiner still works
Too late, I'm convinced it's broken
How did I get the fat lip, while puking I may or may not have sneezed... Wacking my face into the toilet bowl...
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
I thought it was your cat but I was wrong your Roomba is possessed by a pissed-off evil spirit.
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