you know you were way too high when you wake up next to a handwritten list of all the things you'd do for a Klondike bar
Everything about him screamed your future.
She kept saying "I'm going to hell" the entire time we were fucking. I really wasn't sure what to do... so I agreed with her.
That was definitely the right answer.
I miss the days when all my weekends consisted of were 69 and crunchwraps
No you can't have a vodka redbull. The pilgrims didn't have vodka redbull.
all he has to do is look at me on new years and hes getting laid. thats how hot he is
Sometimes I seriously wonder if I could get away with vodka Sundays at work. Cuz this red bull feels naked.
Apparently I was holding on to a pizza crust for hours last night.
So mom called me from the hospital laughing her ass off. Apparently my sister is allergic to cocaine...
I forced myself to puke in my garbage can, and the next day I bought a new one and burnt the old one. You could say it was a rough night
Discovery: there is a folder in my pictures labeled "Your Name and cats"
this is the last time i am going to a 7am booty call
Fucked him in a graveyard. Need plan b.
I like shiny stuff tho if that’s an emotion
Since moving to the suburbs, all I do is fuck my ex and watch cartoons. It's not so bad.
Randomize
