I cont stop tolking in a british axsent
Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
you got in your car and made the sounds of a NASCAR, then called me on your phone and I was your pit crew. then you apparently you won the race, and THAT'S when you tried to backflip off the top of your car.
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
Karaoke into a bottle of boones. dear summer in alabama, glad to see you again.
Do you think if you have sex with a girl twin, her twin brother feels it to? Woke up at her house and they both have a look of disappointment on their faces.
its kind of scaring me that i am turned on by tom cruise in rock of ages
After we had sex he made me watch a Top Gun highlight video...
I thought the Bane mask would really repel dudes but instead I ended up grinding on a frat dude that whispered "bad bitch contest, you in first place" in my ear in a Batman voice
Then I did coke with my taxi driver where he then ended up paying me for the drive. You should try being a girl sometime it's super sick.
Hey man, when I left for work she was laying on the couch naked cuddling your keurig, can you clean that mess up?
How weird would it be for me to get 1 hour photos printed at CVS of my partially or all nude?
bitch dont make me pour hotsauce in your vagina
Don’t eat the Doritos. Jeff was eating them while he was watching porn
So... my daughter's new girlfriend Is the daughter of the girl I dated on and off in college Who ran away because she got pregnant at my house party. My Legitimate daughter Is probably fucking my Illegitimate daughter...
Randomize
