We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
My head feels like little people r playing bumper cars inside it
There's a girl here with sideburns. I gave her your number, you can thank me later.
was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
you said the mailboxes were turning into babies and they started crawling away. then you cried and asked me how you were gonna get your college acceptance letters
Still waiting. He said he'd call between 2 and 10... apparently he's like the Comcast of drug dealers.
I no longer question where these bruises come from... between the strip pole in the living room, the slipnslide in the hallway and our constant level of intoxication I will always be bruised...
my greatest accomplishment from the city of diplomacy is that i puked at a table of 5 diplomats and my professor and NONE OF THEM NOTICED
So as I left the Australian's hotel room, I said "Welcome to America. You're going to do just fine here."
I remember key bumps, porn and a mom in my bed. Sums up my day.
that is an amazing summary hahaha
I bet George Washington got SERIOUS head back in his hay day.
I plan on drinking enough to kill at least 2 frat boys and make an aa meeting weep for joy
I lost my bar virginty and made out with a dwarf. It was a good night
Those thigh tattoos deserve the handsomest of grins between them. Dont settle.
we will now reference it as "the infamous double dick night"
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