dude, showing up drunk to physics was the best idea ever. I just tripled my participation for the semester. I love st pattys day
He's just a really nice guy who stuck his tongue in the wrong place.
Was I really yelling "girls night" at random chicks before stealing and drinking all their shots?
eta to your mouth 5 minutes
If you do that, i will make all sorts of uncomfortable comments about my nipples being soft
Sleeping with random people is the same as soul searching, right? Ps that wasn't a team name suggestion.
Can't even walk I haven't tried talking but I probably can't do that either
We had sex on the beach. I was completely naked except for my sneakers. That's when you know
I felt really bad for not letting her go in, it was like we were dangling lesbians in front of her
No it's a real cult, with original ideas and shit like that
I'm upset for all the future generations who can't drunkenly get cheesy bread
I stole the butter cup cuz i brought home my rolls and chicken and didnt want the butter everywhere. I miss your body because its amazing.
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
so on a scale from morning glass of wine to that time i burnt the garage down how drunk were you last night
About 'lets tie a boat to a truck and ride it down the freeway'
Just made my first drink, took 2 sips feel like god
Randomize
