His mom made me a necklace that i am supposed to wear to prom. She included a note with it, which had a star trek quote. What have I gotten myself into?
I just found a porn show called cleavagefield. no i am not watching.
I've never seen anyone write a check for a bar tab before
The bouncer was kicking me out and I put up my finger for him to wait while I chugged the rest of my drink..all he could say is "are you serious right now?"
If I buy you $300 worth of popeyes, will that make up for me trashing the house?
i like to finish this college football season knowing that not once have I had to masturbate to erin andrews
Thanks for talking me down from peeing on his window last night.
I am now curious as to how you would have aimed.
You did a jig for the bouncer when you saw him. Just reminding you.
You could have chosen coming to fuck me over getting too hammered to drive. But you made your bed, and now you get to jack off alone in it.
And. I know i am a gay man cause when i saw the pic of his cock his feet were in it and i am like what the fuck?
I got high with the cantor. Rethinking this whole non-practicing Jew thing.
Dude I thought she was trying to turn my dick inside out
I just got high off one hit and the. Spent 20 minutes inspecting the gasket of our refridgerator and researching ways to replace it
I have really important information for you regarding the furry convention this weekend
It was a good thing I was on the balcony flashing those guys or I would have never seen her skipping to his car
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