thank you for a lively/lovely evening :)
should have blown me.
I just found a 1/2 inch of mimosa in my shoe.
You should get more absorbent shoes.
I gurantee you I'll be the only one dressed as a giraffe.
We all told you to throw up but you just stuck your head in the toilet and screamed..
As a female I reserve the right to put my ipod in my cleavage because I have no pockets and not get judged by other girls right??
Im just saying it can't be that bad if he drove himself to the er. We'll head that way when we finish playing scattergories
I had to assert my dominance as Alpha Drunk.
He showed up in a dinosaur costume bearing a tray of cupcakes. He even let me hold his tail. I'm marrying this guy.
He told me I was 100% better then porn then passed out nto the cake
I tried to high-five the cop last night. he just looked at my raised hand and told me to go to bed.
I actually feel a twinge of sadness recycling all of our handles... I feel like I'm throwing out some great memories or lack of them because we don't remember
She asked me to come on her OkCupid date with her
I was so drunk last night dude. I woke up this morning to my oven being wide open and my pants on the kitchen floor.
Video footage says last night I reincarnated as stripper Shania Twain... Man, I feel like a (slutty) woman.
roommates are droppin acid, i really should stop them from staring directly at the light bulb, but their giggles are so enchanting.
Randomize
