That level of neurosis does not find love outside of Grey's Anatomy.
question. what would be the least awkward way to ask your one night stand if he came inside of you because you would really prefer not to have his illegitimate lovechild. hypothetically.
I told him I'd give him a BJ if he admited Hanson was good.
Best idea ever: Giving hobos a beer and having a chugging contest to win another beer. Most fun I have had downtown in a while.
The security guard told you that the room was off limits and you just looked at him and said,"Its okay, I have a beard".
I need the number of a restaurant that delivers, has lock-picking abilities, and is okay with full frontal male nudity. Entirely too hungover to get out of bed.
I officially became the girl who let a guy get her off under the covers last night while her roommate and a friend were there. He was impressed by my ability to stay quiet and stay relatively focused on the conversation...
I am so ashamed of you, and yet so proud.
She saves ONE person's life while blacked out and now she's positive anything can be done "while fucking hammered"
I would fuck him In a heartbeat, an obese child running up stairs with an irregular heartbeat, heartbeat.
He tried to tell me that he could handle his liquor better than "all the bitches in this town." AS HE THREW UP. ALL. OVER.
No amount of beer will make me feel better about this. It's time for Emergency Whisky
Hahahaha don't tempt me. Remember we're trying to avoid airport jail if possible
Lets just say I tried to pinky promise the cop... So I was fucked up.
Im going to seductively wisper "that butters my biscuit" in your ear
if I was a good friend this would be the time that i would remind you that you have a boyfriend
Randomize
