"fuck a duck" is spelled out in chinese food on my counter... im kind of nervous to search the rest of my house......
went to the gyno and found out that i have a birthmark on my clit. its like god gave guys a little help when it comes to getting me off.
I made her cum... she sounded like Ray Romano
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
This is one of the fundamental differences between you and I. If I found meat in a plastic bag, I wouldn't put it in my mouth.
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
I'm going to make a mold of my tits to bake a cake for him for our anniversary.. I can see the pride in his eyes now.
i would have thought, that you two being my best friends, one of you would have atleast tried to catch me before i hit the ground after blacking out.
It's stupid hot. I just want to be laying in a bathtub full of margaritas
btw I told him that the only way he was gonna get to eat you out was if he smothered your vag with grits..
Bless her heart. Her stupid, drunk, adderall-ed heart.
His balls are like really small, like dog sized balls. It was a weird discovery. Ever done a guy with dog sized balls?
I encourage you to ignore feeling. Drinking more helps
One day no one will want to send me dick pics so by all means keep 'em coming
I'm sitting here drinking whisky and listening to The Wiggles, I don't need a social life
Randomize
