i saved all my weight watcher points for this alcohol
your dick doesn't do me any good in arizona
He ate me out and then left in a hurry and shouted "Sorry to dine and dash" as he left my house
i remember too much of last night for it to have been successful
so why was i the only one who woke up with ham stuck to my ass?
We dared each other to drink Arbor Mist, and I waterboarded someone with tequila.
I'm toasting stale bread and thinking of you
Is that a sex thing?
I didn't mind you coming over, just I'm quite sure most booty calls don't involve a scavenger hunt...
I either have a razor blade lodged in my throat or I've been drinking entirely too much Evan Williams.
It's like my life is one of those movies where after a bunch of outlandish events that only happen in a movie the girl realizes her true life calling and lives a great life with a sexy man of multiple races. But I'm stuck in the fucked up part where 25 year olds come in their pants.
We had a threesome and he gave us bottle rockets and a lamp for our apartment
I have seen you puke and 5 mins later rock my world. So there is hotness there that average people will never see..
Thanks for fucking the skin off my dick
It was a joint effort between my vagina my feet and your hand you can't just blame that all on me
I am no longer and illegal Moonshiner. I just made thousands of gallons of incredibly High test alcohol with police watching and waiting for thare couple of jugs so that they can bring home and disinfect their houses with it. I'm fat with money at the moment.
Unfortunately the rum ran out midway through our viewing and we had to suffer in silence for the rest of it.
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