so I guess it's not okay to mix vodka and ..everything and then proceed to offer a lap dance to ...everyone.
So I've come to the conclusion that I would cry if I had an ugly baby.
Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
Remember that amazing deer? You peed next to that dear..
They're doing a Bong-A-Thon for 4/20. I don't care if you quit. You are coming out of your weed retirement for this.
You started a dance party so that you could steal their vodka and shouted "sailors out!"
i'm about to say screw it and get drunk in the hotel by myself
It's 2 pm, at least sit by the pool...
When we were done making out, some guy ran into the room yelling, "I'll save you Brandon! I'll save you!"
you were crying saying "if you love me you will find me a loaf of bread"
I mean you would really have to try to not have fun at a party that doesn't require pants....
things I never thought I would say vol. 24 "Bagpipes just remind me that my relationship is over"
I totally almost forgot you fucked that guy. St. Patty's bar crawls always have a drawback.
Just woke up with an entire pack of Oreos in my cheetah onesie. I've been waiting for this moment forever.
I am lonely and hungry. I need a girlfriend, but I'd settle for my mom.
I just want some dick and chicken fingers please advise
At least you didn't lose your virginity to chumbawumba
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