East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
ohhh no, absolutely not. i am waaayyy too superstitious to have sex with the self-proclaimed "baby-maker" on father's day...
Have you been tested recently?
Well I got my shots when I was a baby so I think I'm immune
I know it sounds like a good idea, but doing Spanish homework at a bar just because the owners are Mexican and they give us margaritas really wasn't the best decision.
This is working out surprisingly well considering it started out with us using a christmas tree as a battering ram
I'm laying outside on my patio attempting to get sun with a puke bucket next to me... This is dedication to the tan my friend
I found him down the block clinging to a light post laughing and crying because a house "looked like it had buck teeth"
Hey dude. I've got a mini fridge in my closet now so we don't have to worry about getting drunk and falling down the stairs on our way to get more beer.
Proudest moment of my life. Just watched a guy walk into the side of a car because I winked at him. Love these yoga pants and my hair. Fuck yes. His mouth was hanging open.
I haven't been sober in 4 days.
Then be sober
No.
You ever feel like just rubbing your face in everything like a dog?
He doesn't have an existential crisis after we have really violent sex now which is nice
he just fucked me for my cheese.
I'm not well. Although it could be worse.
My cousin is so hungover she quit her job.
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