Tell me why I keep soberly hesitating to go pee in fear of breaking the seal. Thank you college.
It would be one hovered percent delicioui
There is a girl on the metro with no shoes and she's using a Crown Royal bag as a purse.
WHY DO I WANT TO FUCK EVERY GUY THAT BREATHES
He was just lying in his underwear like a present. I had to unwrap it.
Did she owns a vibrator that will set off seismic activity.
she said she just "wanted a guy who she could cook breakfast for". HUGE MISTAKE. I'm never leaving
It's like she fell out of an MTV reality show and no one knows how to send her back
Waking up with cheese all over my clothes and my vibrator in my pants is a sign we drank way too much tequila last night
Had sex outside for the third time last night. Mosquito bites all over my ass, and i think i have a rash on my nipples. When will i learn.
Just wait till winter
its hard to say precisely how it happened, but the next thing i knew i was on top of a mountain
This is the third time this month a guy I’m not dating has dumped me. How is this even possible???
Where is the baby squirrel I found last night?! I've looked all morning I can't find Morris anywhere did someone take him?? ðŸ˜ðŸ˜
Honey, I kept trying to tell you it was just a pine cone.
He's a downgrade and it was quick. But it was dick nonetheless.
Sorry about kicking you last night but you don’t mess with a girls margarita bucket. Ever
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