I can text with my tongue
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
Drawing dicks in the frost on people's windshields is a rare joy I allow myself while walking to my 8 AM class.
I didn't wanna be that girl that took a shit in the ocean..
That's like lying to my vagina. I can't betray it like that.
I am now trying to reassure her that she doesn't have a wide-set vagina. So thanks, for whatever you said.
He just dragged himself across the floor on his back claiming to be "the swiffer" help
So he was supposed to be helping me with my math but instead we ended up drinking coconut rum in his basement and having sex. I think my mom was right, getting a tutor will be good for me. Relieves the stress.
Which one of you fuckers thought itd be funny to see if the kitchen table can float.
I'm trying to decide whether it's worth it to masturbate in this gas station bathroom
I might have been the first person to be rolling balls at a referee seminar
He either works for the Irish Mob or I'm being Catfished
So i just remembered that thing i use to do with your butt because of shark week.
he called me his ex's name during sex then proceeded to cry while still in me
Two grav bong hits and a shower later and I'm ready for company
It's like you say things that speak to my soul on a deep personal level
Randomize
