My sole motivation for showering this morning was to masturbate. Something is wrong here...
just peed in the tub. didnt notice the passed out drunk guys there until a minute in
The djing cat is back again. I think he just makes appearances when im shit drunk just to fuck with my mind.
We were laying in the basement dry humping to the rhythm of the washing machine
You texted me "Americans are sad" and "chicken coop disaster" without any further explanation.
This guy either needs to stop touching me or buy me another drink.
It's been this way for a few days. I had chick fil a on Friday so this could be an attack from the Gay Gods as punishment.
I knew no one else would have gone along with it since it's morally wrong and probably illegal. You said, "Yes. And let's add fireworks."
Thanks for setting a pic of your balls as my desktop background. You'll find you're cc'ed on the mass email of it.
its the first football sunday and my boyfriend isn't excited. this isn't gonna last unless he makes me snacks and brings me beer during the game.
His dick is pure magic - dark, powerful, beautiful magic. It's the Elder Wand of penises
Anytime he goes down on me i automatically think of you cheering me on. Your a good friend.
You tried to eat your way through the wall. Like you literally tried to eat drywall and insulation.
I was watchin a porno and I sware I saw that dude at the bar at applebees the other night
He’s definitely circumcised. There’s not enough room in those speedos for a foreskin with that fire hose he’s packing.
Randomize
