Reminder- he's a douche bag. A big one.
I dreamt Michael Jackson dropped his pants in front of me and I had to ignore it.
so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
I miss Bob Barker.
Yeah, more like Douche Carey...
Thanks for not cleaning the drain like you were supposed to. I just vomited in the shower and I had to stand in it until I was done conditioning.
My favorite part was walking in the bathroom, you fixing yourself in the mirror, calling your reflection a fag, then throwing a haymaker into the paper towel dispenser before going back out to the bar.
he turned two sober chicks into 7 drunken girls...he's my hero
I met her at the liquor store. I hope I'm wearing a condom
we didn't have anything to do and wanted to get our money's worth out of our costumes, so if you see two mermaids day drinking by the creek it's us
I puked on myself in front of a customer. all. over. myself. thanks Saturday nights
Dammit now I'm pissed. Its like I am torn between two worlds. A world of girls, and a world of people punching other people in the head. Both are just so beautiful.
Showering in not my own throw up is really hittin the spot right now.
no, you don't understand how much people deal here. All I had to say was "hey lets buy a bag" and he pulled over instantly, then the randoms in the car behind us pulled over and sold us a bag.
Did you throw up out the back door and cover it with paper towels?
I have to close one eye, because I don't wanna see two movies, I only want to see one.
Randomize
