Successfully pulled the houdini tonight. Check that off my list.
operation "beaches make me wet" is a go
hey boys, thanks for all the pictures of your dick you took with my camera last night...they were really nice to stumble upon while reliving my night in the breakroom today at work
I can blatently call girls sluts here and they think i'm speaking norwegian
hell no. last time, i couldn't pee straight for a week.
he was like the dessert in the all you can eat man buffet that has become my life.
I can't wait for round whatever # we're on tonight.
Crumbling up chips, putting them in salsa, eating with spoon. New level of stoner fatassery. Its so genius/delicous i'm not even ashamed
HOW MANY BOYS NOT ONLY APPROVE OF YOUR PLAN TO BECOME POCAHONTAS, BUT WANT TO MAKE SURE YOU DO IT RIGHT? One, the answer is one, and he is the best and if anyone ever tries to steal him I can assure you they will never be heard from again
Just want to apologize again for asking to spot your form in the shower.
You yell at me for giving you beer but not for licking spilled beer off your chest.
In other news my pubic hair is covered in glitter.
When are your genitals available?
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
may or may not have snorted a line of tums... wtf.
Randomize
