So ignoring my calls doesnt work if you update your facebook a minute later.
she was talking to me but i could help but stare at the extremely long hairs on her boobs. then she says, "your looking at the hair on my boobs aren't you"
sorry i walked in and ruined it, but i had to laugh she looked like a pile of bologna the way you had her pinned up on the wall
She used the word "fragged" in proper context. tell me that's not bust-nut hot.
That's saying a lot from the girl who takes her liquor with her to the library
he opened the microwave and beer cans poured out
He had a 99.9% chance of getting laid...until he started cutting down the frat's volleyball nets with his pocket knife.
His ass WILL be my cock's next vacation home.
I wish I had a dick so I could say shit like that.
Where are you? We're in between the guy dressed as a giant inflatable penis and the Justin Bieber lookalike lesbians
Does the penis have a genital wart?
If a cougar buys you pizza and wants to show you her newly-won house, you have sex with her. It's the law. Just being all the man I can be dude
Blacking out is all I've done this year and we're only 3 days in. Checkmate bitch.
She had an asthma attack and had to stop but insisted on getting me off. It's official she's the one
We hooked up last night. I think it was great for our friendship.
ITS THE FIRST FRIDAY NIGJT AFTER MOVING IN WITH THE NEW ROOMIE AND I ACTUALLY JIST RIPPED MY TAMPON OUT AND THREW IT IN THE NEIGHBORS YARD WERE GOINF ON THE BOAT AND SLEPEING IN HIS AMBULANCE GOODNIGHT
I fell into the fireplace. That is a pretty good sign to stop drinking fireball
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