u on campus? she just peed the bed i need to go
I have "you made mistakes last night" written alllll over me.
I left two shots of jager for you guys when you wake up from your death. Do with it as you wish
The night started going downhill when I set my foot on fire.
Was I really yelling "girls night" at random chicks before stealing and drinking all their shots?
If he shows up in a "mount n dew" me shirt im throwing him to the lesbians
Someone downtown drunkenly stole the antenna off of her car... while she was driving.
Actually let's just focus our energy on not getting committed to a psych ward.
Either I think of sex like a man, or all the men in Vegas are women.
Did I send you a drunk selfie with a pine tree last night?
I will teach you the ways of the ho life, my little gay grasshopper.
Yes ma'am. I'm attracted to unconventional people, you know that.
True. I can't judge, half of my sexual partners I only know a false first name & a number. We all have our kinks.
I might be a bit longer... I found a hot guy at the grocery store, so I'm following him and buying stuff that he's buying
I'm at work behind the bar and just washed my mouth out with rumple bc I don't have a toothbrush. This may be a new low.
Fuck this virus. We’re finally back on campus but the bars suck parties are banned sports are canceled we eat in our rooms and can’t fucking hangout with anyone. I’m tired of virtual classes and involuntary celibacy
OMG IKR! It’s not college unless we’re puking in a toilet wondering if we’re pregnant or just hungover!
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