her voice honestly makes me want to vomit. i have springsteen cranked up all the way.
New Low: Just set a reminder on my phone for me to check on things I need to harvest late on Farmville.
The walk of shame isn't so shameful when you do it in a stolen, autographed Favre jersey.
You have to understand, this is the first time I'm looking at a whopper sober.
Just got physical proof that at 6 am i was running around with raw potatoes threatening to mash them on his floor. Hello, Mobile uploads
Its a Guy he gets weed for. I'm kinda confused as to why there are going to even be tuxedos involved at all.
we aren't going to have kids. there's a 50% chance that they would look like him. not worth the risk
Dude she's on meds. He has a ginormous penis. Ur A dumbass. That concludes our feelings chat. Dim Sumday?
Dude you were sitting on a bench on the street with her for 45 minutes thinking you were on the bus
I will always remember that night by waking up in that tablecloth the next morning
The condom broke. Its OK tho, turns out I was just humping her thigh for 20 minutes. Jager dude, Jager.
I just flicked a lizard out of the window with a bud light in one hand and spatula inthe other...dont tell me you dont miss the south
you are the only girl i know that would bring a plate of cookies to a hook up. but they were awesome. thanks. next time cupcakes?
I’m glad they have a happy marriage but why do they have to inflict it on the rest of us?
Drinking is such a hassle. I wish I could just press a button and be drunk.
Randomize
