hey babe. i'll pick you up in my mom's car. with my mom. she has nothing to do tonight.
im pretty sure vibrators are the best invention since dinosaur chicken nuggets
after the cops left he pulled the weed out of his ass and we smoked it
i just rolled a joint on the giving tree. that book has given me so much.
and he said i stripped him down, hand cuffed him to his bed post, and tickled his arm pits, and then continued to watch The Hangover.
I really couldn't tell if she was disgusted with the fact that I yacked on her shoes, or if she was about to do the same to me.
We lived together for a year and neither of us knew we were both gay.
It's like a new game! Find out if he's circumcised without actually seeing it
Dude, I just had the best sex of my life in a porta potty at the NCAA girls lax championships but didn't get her name or number. But I have her sunglasses. How is this possible, I'm sad.
I love your life.
We had a pillow fight. It looks like an angel exploded here. A DRUNK ALCOHOLIC ANGEL
The best part of last night was the women's softball game on the TV at the strip club
It's a 'fuck poison control' kind of night.
Do it break your family into faction start a civil war
He responded to all of my texts prodding for dirty talk with "I will do anything you are comfortable with."\n\nChivalry is great, but being comfortable doesn't get me wet.
At least your wife cheated on you. Women will feel bad for you. In a month there will boy bands that are jealous of your dick
Randomize
