Everything went well, until I walked into his bedroom and there was a Ronald Reagan poster watching over his bed - creepy
even a "fuck you" would be nice at this point.
Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
he just spelled fiance, "pheancie". I dont think he's ready to get married.
New rule : you aren't allowed anything . Ever .
Ended up at a lesbian bar and almost got stabbed in the eye with a dart. Weirdest bachelor party ever.
He just sent me a picture of himself naked while cooking pancakes and he made the caption "bitchin' in the kitchen"
wow. there is a man who hates the post office more than me. he is causing a scene, this is a snapshot of elderly me.
I am drinking green tea.... My liver is in shock
I'm told I threw my cigarettes at the TV one by one Shouting about the cast of Community.
I'm fine w planning around your penis prospecting. Saturday it is.
He literally said, while inside me, "I would smack your ass but I don't want to wake my mom up". Amazing.
You squatted and peed on the living room floor while maintaining eye contact with Sebastian
His 89 y/o father walked in on us. Judging by the gasp/moan, I don't think the 1920s prepared him to see another dude inside his son.
i may have just googled 'is philly rioting right now'
Randomize
