I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
he was wearing a tuxedo, i was naked...it's a long story.
She threw all the patio furniture in the pool saying she was building a castle.
I would also like to inform you that I can no longer lay on my back because my tailbone is bruised from the nightstand. Good job.
Yeah, all the sudden I heard a loud "ding" and realized I had been passed out on the dorm elevator for about an hour....
you're a mystery wrapped in an enigma. wrapped inside a burrito.
it's like his penis is God's way of saying "sorry about his face"
omg i met someone at the bar who sells hair feathers. that are long. saved in my phone as "haiirs deather"
We are going to get clementines. And shoot them out of a ballon launcher. That's after we come up to the ivy with a bullhorn and reck havoc. Where are you.
It's like I'm snorkeling in an ocean of tequila.
Guess who used an inflatable mattress to boat across a retention pond with brooms for oars and a radio and beer.
Nope not happening. When I close my eyes the floor moves. I'm going to enjoy this free roller coaster.
fyi, pepper spray hurts. whoever comes up with the best backstory wins a prize.
Honestly, you can’t tell the whole sorority he has a donkey dick and expect that no one would sleep with him after you broke up
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