In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
i was focused on more important things... like standing, and not spilling my beer
Just used "I used to work as an inflatable toy operator" as a pick up line. Freshman frenzy is great...
Bonus points if someone shits their pants. Only 1/2 bonus points if it's you
Bonus points are bonus points regardless
Me ending up in the fetal position in my shower is becoming far too commonplace. It's like a weekly therapy session
They're tearing apart the house I lost my virginity in:(
We got Pizza Hut & Papa Johns, delivered within seconds of each other, and both delivery people did a shot. I was put on Earth for this moment.
Uhm after 8 I don't recall anything. All I know is there's a picture of me playing pong with my grandmother.
Trying to figure out if the guy I'm with right now is the same guy I met spring break
Oh duude it is the guy from spring break! Awk.
I needed tweezers to get my thong out of my ass this morning.
Fuck you and your widespread penis snapchat
Wtf is this place? I don't see any alcohol and I feel like we were supposed to bring our own strippers.
Beer and Reeses. dinner of champions
YOU CANT JUST BLOW GUYS BC THEY’RE NICE TO YOU LEXI
I CAN IF I WANT TO
We had sex then laid in his bed eating chocolate and drinking juice boxes. I think I'm going to keep him around.
Randomize
