Jizz is so healthy, they should sell it at Jamba Juice. Call it "Jamba's Juice". Genius.
I got her a Nickelback box set.
You kept telling that ginger girl, "it's not your fault, it's not your fault, it's not your fault."
All of my current injuries can be related back to sex.
It was mandatory to shotgun a beer before we were allowed to eat dinner
had a guy just try to take his underwear off in the middle of the bar w o taking his pants off. That kind of Sunday afternoon
In the future let's not drunk dive in the fountain in front of the hotel bar.
Thanks for the drunken voicemail of bird calls. Love and miss you, too.
whatever. i almost had sex in a car with someone passed out in the back seat. phone's not my biggest worry.
So you think it's my fault? I didn't give you the 10 shots you took nor make you eat the brownies we made... btw, i found your engagement ring, it was in the last brownie you wouldn't let me have while dragging me to my room.
That's not a good night. A good night is waking up with no skirt, no money, and the imprint of the edge of the bar on your forehead.
I just woke up to three dick pics. Apparently in my blacked out state. I was asking for them as the new valentines day card.
Wouldn't it be fantastic if the corporate world cared less about about our GPA and focused more on our mastery of social drunkenness?
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
Explain to me again why I'm doing the walk of shame if we fucked at my house?
Randomize
