There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
So... My dad just saw the Plan B package and the beer cans in my backseat.
Oh its cool I'm sure he already knows you're a whore and an alcoholic.
So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
if every girl in minneapolis isn't pregnant when i get back to the cities i will cry
You really need to tell him that he has a girlfriend. I'm not sure he knows
i literally paused in the middle of it, turned on my light, pointed to the picture netxt to my bed and go "you hooked up with my roommate too!!! AWWW!" he was so weirded out. i don't think he understands the relationship we have..we share..
Yeah, I wouldn't mind getting fingered in the corner of a dive bar again.
But he was wearing a glow-in-the-dark condom. It was like a glowing rod of kryptonite. I can't resist that, kryptonite is my weakness.
Good news. I heard back from the doctor and I don't have a liver problem.
...yet.
Yepp, I had to be the one to explain that the girl who was slapping people in the face with a dildo was my drunk girlfriend.
I feel like I should throw some tampons around my workspace so everyone will know what's really going on
Not yoga, whiskey. Totally mis-typed whiskey.
You were cuddling with an eight iron and I was eating a fajita completely ignoring your presence.
Nothing like an afternoon walk of shame across campus on parent's weekend. Damn.
Randomize
