And now I'm afraid that I'm a pornographic eater.
He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
His texts read Like a 15 year olds diary.
dibs on John Mayer's hood pass
I ended up on the roof were calling it a tie
Disasters an understatement. Hurricane alpha chi omega hit. On my way to buy carpet cleaner, super glue, and a new liver. Be back soon.
All I'm asking for is flower occasionally, and in return you get to come home to me naked in heels. Is that to much to ask for?
It is becoming increasingly more likely that my entire halloween costume will be entirely composed of borrowed clothing from the two girls I'm hooking up
Shit my boyfriend's roommate thinks thinks: I love getting woken up to the sound of my roommate getting a blowjob
Keywords: shitstorm, police, jail.
I need to stop agreeing to hang out with people when I'm drunk.
What could go wrong? i could have a mental breakdown with a bottle of champagne hand cuffed to a frat bro
on the bright side i found your panties and the lid to the nutella
I am way to hungover for it to be Thursday.
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