Just saw a midget shotgun a coors light
We just picked up about 540 lbs of women....
Banned from zoo.
Again?
She's in Spain. I'm in Holland. World Cup Final is Sunday.
Dude, it's like the Romeo and Juliet of FIFA.
i think the beer goggles wore off after hearing the story of her 2nd abortion
What happens at the gay bar stays at the gay bar. Except that I sold my panties for $100. People should know that.
Here's a tip. Don't party with someone that needs sexual attention. Drinking and sexual attention don't mesh well in the morning. Especially over a bowl of Cheerios.
You do realize how pathetic it is when the woman who does your bikini waxes has seen your vagina more than I have
lesson learned.. dressing up like a naughty teacher doesn't mean you can get away with spanking a cop with a ruler for being "fresh" with you
Well, our assistant supervisor caught us on the back stairs...he invited us on a double date with his fiance and him. I guess our job approves of the relationship?
She made me walk a straight line to prove i was sober enough to help carry you to the car
Knowing you it was perfect out of spite. Like. A line straighter than YOU
I woke up in a bath tub and my face was sore and it wasn't because of you, I was impressed
Currently playing charity bingo with coworkers so if u were ever gonna send a dick pic now is the time
I wanna riverboat gamble on your vaginal waters. Just sayin
Yes we can sext. I'm taking my socks off.
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