remember what we learned. dont lure girls w/ food at the bar. u dont want those ones
I just saw someone EAT a flashcard out of frustration. Finals suck.
i broight you flpweers amd vodka. open yoir bask door
this weekend destroyed me...my brain feels like the curly fry at the bottom of the bag. GAhhh come save me
that's ecstasy for ya. now I'm kinda in the mood for jack in the box.
Made fish tank punch. It's like trash can punch but in a fish tank. Also, my dad saw a picture I uploaded on Facebook and called me a pussy for only making 10 gallons.
raced the clock twice to day to see if i could get off before my computer died and before i left for my noon bar crawl... win, win
lets go back to having secrets in our friendship
Going through my purse trying to find money for this cab but all I keep pulling out if chicken from my burrito o ate an hour ago. Help?
i accidenteley seduced the christian girl's brother so i dont think we can count on free church picnic food again
I fucking hate you. Some slutty looking drunk chick backed her ass up across the bar and started grinding on you. You ignored her because you didn't want to share you drink
I care about my drink far more than her feelings
Is there a polite way to say "Sorry for your head injury but I still want to hook up"?
It's national "dress up your pet day" come over. Drugs and dressed up cats..it's the shit dreams are made of.
WTF moment this morning: we were getting ready to leave and he reaches under his mattress to pull out his gun. All I could do was look at him and go "really?!"
She brought me back a blanket from Mexico, then we had sex on it
I just don't understand what you plan on accomplishing there except for losing all vestiges of post-freshman year dignity
Reverse road head. Sa-witch!!!
Randomize
