She's a black belt cougar in the 6th degree.
dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
I like how you refer to peeing in the car as "super cute"
i woke up wearing her shoes. this night isn't going on my highlight reel
Remind me to call McDonald's to give a good review of Ruth. She truly demonstrated grace under pressure.
Drinking heavily at 3pm and about to rescue a 30lb street turtle. Dont even bother attempting to rise to this level bitch
My entire summer has consisted of being too drunk for this shit, too sober for this shit, or too hungover for this shit.
We play beat the clock every morning. When the alarm goes off, she hits snooze and drops her panties. If I can't finish in time to beat the snooze, she jumps in the shower and I've gotta jerk off.
I don't want to get pregnant doggy style. That's sad.
I thought you might think I was an idiot who thought cock rings prevent STDs,
Whatever. I just want to indulge in this mcchicken and forget all about his tiny penis.
Just took physics exam. I think this is one of those 'chuck it in the fuck-it bucket and become an art major' days
He broke into my house because he missed me. Then ends the relationship because I'm the needy one. Ironic much?
You yelled "Shame!" like you were that bitch from Game of Thrones and then hit my balls full force with your sports bra
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