Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
At what point in time did you decide the pot head with Taco Bell was more important than all your friends.
At about the same time you guys weren't burritos.
I had a party to get rid of booze. Woke up with even more. Will do this till I can open a liquor store
there were like 150 questions AFTER the application. you'd think for a store that has dick molding kits it'd be a joke
I thought the one perk of the low caliber of men I've slept with thus far in my college career is that I would never run into them in the library. I've been here for ten minutes and we're on number three.
I FUCKING SERVED PEOPLE AND POURDED JUGS AND GOT FREE BEEEEEEEERERTERRY
You sat there for 20minutes trying to seduce the picture of my dad.
We still on for coffee?
Cream and sugar. Deliver to planned parenthood in 45.
I'll answer your question with a question: Are you gonna be too high?
He's such a champ. He puked on purpose just so he'd be coherent enough to roll this blunt
Right when he asked me if I was on birth control my dad walked in. This is my fate.
I never turn down an adventure. My life is like a sexual Lord of the Rings.
I checked her ID this morning. Lets just say...she's older than my mom
She was drunk at Red Robin. She asked for more fries and then shoved them in her purse while saying "Come on bitches, you're coming with me" to them.
Randomize
