She had a bottle of NAIR in her bathroom, but she clearly hadn't been using it.
so i had a hang over on saturday and i stayed in the shower for 4 hours, then crawled out, skimpered to my bed, and some kid i didnt know was sleeping in it
I just want you to know IcyHot in the ear is weird. Don't ask.
I hid my booze in my old Sesame Street lunch box. Big Bird might be disappointed, but I feel Oscar the Grouch would approve.
he turned down sex AND sandwiches. who the hell does that?!
If this week is any indication of my life here I've got to get out ASAP. My liver can't hack it.
And then. You beer bonged 3 tall boys. In a row. Fell into some kids lap. And pulled down my shirt trying to get up. Thank you for that. I got laid
id say bad/good trip...at first I wanted to claw off my skin... but then when i tried i ended up tickling myself for an hour.
His name sounds so important....sounds like the name of my future baby daddy to me.
He was wearing running shoes tho. Thats like the cardinal rule. You don't fuck a guy who wears running shoes as regular shoes.
To this day, I regret not having sex in the bathroom
You'll be happy to know that the bruise is gone from my cock
Did you hear about the guy wearing a spiderman mask running around naked with a bottle of patron?
Yeah.
I was spiderman.
Been smoking since 4. The inevitable finally happened: I bought a cheesecake.
he offered to let me fuck his brother , of course im marrying him
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