too bad you can't see the clap by looking at her face.
she is a standing ovation.
I just applied for an unsubsidized loan naked. I love the internet.
I just found glass in my funny face pancakes, there's nothing funny about that.
then I woke up and felt a boner that wasn't even mine. never taking 3am vodka again
he acted like he had never seen anyone snort lines of adderall off of a microwave before. freshman.
Look I know it's late and I hope this doesn't wake you up but I feel like you should know that I'm sleeping on my couch in my own apartment so that my friend can get laid in my bed, and I would do the same for you.
I did the crab walk everywhere because I was drunk enough that it was easier than standing up.
Definitely sounds like it's time for some eggs with a side of strap on
Omg.....I raised my camera to take a pic at this presentation, and I wanted to zoom in, so I swiped my phone to the left and up pops my dick pic from last night.
I can't bring myself to turn around to see if pple saw it.
library dates and plan B? He is looking like a great catch.
I still count it as showing your tits. Even though the wall was the only one who saw anything. Your boyfriend was pissed.
Today marks the 365th consecutive day of jerkin it. I couldn't have done it without you guys. #onlynewyearsresolutionaccomplished
And I threw up 26 times yesterday. I actually think I threw up a spider too.
I didn't want to leave, I wanted to move into his ass
I'm sitting in the hospital with him while he's still half drunk with a busted leg because he thought he could do parkour off a rock
Randomize
