too bad you can't see the clap by looking at her face.
she is a standing ovation.
I fuked that chick last night and she kept saying, "oh...oh....oh", like Bill Lumberg
so what did you do?
I did the mash I did the monster mash It was a graveyard smash!
your boyfriend is drunk and yelling to the bar that he loves his cats
She just referred to her vagina as "this bitch".
My coke dealer 411'd my work number just to see how I was doing and gave me his new number. He must miss my business
Just took my birth control pill next to the cubicle where we had sex last semester.
Believe me. As soon as the boss man is out the door. I am on my way to wow your vagina with my horse-like attributes.
Even though he had a fractured vertebrae, the sex was still phenomenal. Better than normal actually. I hope the vertabrae never heals.
Dude. You stood in a corner laughing your ass off while folding clothes, facing the wall. Yes, they were weed brownies..
Well that's my green light to bang ur brother. Its not real til its on fb
I'm high. Everything has a 45° angle. That is as far as my eyes open
I ate the crust off the pizza and left the rest in the box. Even I would hate me.
Pretty sure we ruined a bachelorettes life last night
And thanks for putting me in that safety position on the bathroom floor while I was spooning the toilet
it was weird i started the party in just my underwear and woke up in my clothes
Randomize
