I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
I just watched a girl at work pick her nose with 4 of her 5 fingers. So I now know what sausage biscuits taste like in vomit form.
shit I'm tired of wearing other peoples clothes to bed
If you hear screaming in the middle of the night, bat got loose. Call poison control immediately and explain rabies
yeah I'm sure your grandparents are the best but it's halloween. get a slutty costume and let's go ham.
Taking advantage of alcohol's depressant capabilities to curtail my fever. SCIENCE!
Someone snapchat me a pic of you topless laying on the bar with Scotty pouring a bottle of tequila down your throat. IT'S NOT EVEN ELEVEN YET.
School starts next week
She ran from her surprise party screaming "I'm not ready for an intervention." Yeah, the girl has a problem.
I was gonna drive but when i tried to use telekinesis to get my keys, I knew I shouldn't be driving
Seriously? People are paying $45 for Surge?!? I've seen better one night stand decisions being made then the choices being made on amazon orders of Surge
You ate my pie without asking. So don't get butt hurt if I send you link to plus size clothing stores.
Dude we just exchanged Zelda related pickup lines. I fell in love at "you can blow on my ocarina"
IF THE SUNS NOT EVEN OUT THEN WHY IS HIS DICK OUT WTF
I covered the puke with a shingle there's not many chunks. I think it will blend quickly.
I don't know what it is about this quarantine, but I have never written this much smutty fanfic in my life and I am loving it!
Randomize
