At least I can take solace in the fact that with 8 billion some odd people in the world, at least one of them is shitting in their own car right now.
trying to fathom saturday night and the fact that Rainn Wilson now hates me. my brain hurts.
Bein cut off at a bar is embarassing ...until you get to the next bar.
I love the "adulterer" look on you. It's hot.
Its part of my fall instant classic line.
I mean, it's free alcohol, to turn it down would be a crime against humanity.
this will be a night to untag.
Who's got a bloodstream full of margaritas by 2pm? Not you, that's for sure, because you've got one of those "real" jobs.
I told myself this year would be different, I wouldn't get "pee in a fish tank drunk".. Got to the girls house... Fish tank in her room.. 2 years in a row.. had to keep the tradition going
I like to think of it as a lesbian feast.
You just squeezed a person out of you and I'm drunks at 2PM. Our lives got traded and you know it and you're jealous.
I blacked out for most of the day but apparently I still met with my prof. I made notes...
It's gonna be ok. As we grow older we sometimes lose sight of what's important to us. Like safe sex. And standards.
unless you have a dick and you were thinking of chopping that off
I had to pee so bad that I snuck into the bathroom while they were in the shower. At her request, he was massaging her boobs so they could grow faster. Also there was a laser light machine.
Gatorade without vodka just doesn't taste the same
Randomize
