She fell asleep on the sidewalk and people starting using her as a hurdle
You screamed for campus security to do something about the police officer who dumping ur 40
Just a heads up, i'm sleeping in te back seat of your car so don't be freaked out when you see me in the A.M.
He gave me a card that said "I'm so glad we found each other... In the pants" and a pat on the head... My walk of Shame wasn't so bad.
Seriously, I am going to crawl in a hole, sew my vagina shut, and spit acid on any man that comes near me.
If you make 120 dollars and I walk instd of drive and don't eat or smoke this week we can pay rent
C'mon pople!!! THursday afternoon isnot gonna drinkin itself!!!
I had to rub one out before the Shabbat dinner in case I find a nice Jewish girl to fuck me in the bathroom.
Your mother would be so proud
He went to cum on my stomach and somehow it got behind my ear. He's like a fucking jizz Houdini.
Dude you're fine. You're 5 minutes away from your house and you're eating fig newtons
Before you started puking your brains out, you took a moment to give me the correct order of the Harry potter series
the walk of shame isn't very shameful when your mom tells you she's proud of you.
You hit your head and proceeded to fall in the floor, curl up in my lap and make me rock you like a small infant. I was beginning to worry until you started to sing "Rock me momma like a wagon wheel".
She tied me to her bed using her honor chords. Thank god for graduation!
I just want to nap all the time and eat Chinese food.
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