she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
im guessing your the one that tried to make bacon in the toaster
the cop then proceeds to point out the "proud parent of a dare graduate" bumper sticker and say well i guess it's time to take that off
Cumming on a girls face is guy code for you're not wife material.
I really hope our interview with channel 6 last night doesn't air or else my parents are gona get a first hand look at my alcohol problem
and my souvenir for the night was a nice ambulance blanket
Last thing I remember is Dusty riding the bikes we "borrowed" from the hotel through the CVS while the rest of us picked up the girls who were laughing at him
It's like my butt was the only innocence I had left and now I don't even have that.
No idea. I woke up in the middle of the night to you drooling and gnawing on my arm. Then you rolled over, punched the air 4 times, then proceeded to talk about your hair in your sleep.
i want to have awesome sex and feel fuzzy.
Specially since he wanted to forget that we even touched, which makes it funnier because I don't think you can take back licking someone's butthole...
When your guy changes his swinger profile to include you. #makingprogress
Chasing down vodka with apple juice and crying. Alone.
I have hit the ultimate fuck buddy status. We pulled over in a construction zone to have a quickie.
They have one of those claw machines here... with a dildo in it...
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