I had total buyers remorse when i finally got him naked. All that effort for a dude that hairy? Come on.
i wish you could fill a pinata with booze
I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
She said she never had to courage to go fully shaved. Since when did shaving your snatch become courageous?
the man who designed bathrooms to have toilets within easy puking distance from the shower is my hero
Just so you know I would totally fuck you. Does that count as a feeling?
you blew your rape whistle in his face every time he got near a girl till he left the party...
I will take a blow job from a dude that kinda looks like a girl at this point
Building a door into the garage so when I bring girls home my mom doesn't wake up.
Pathetic yet considerate
well I tackled her when she was going to go upstairs because I was convinced that the house was haunted. You gotta stick together in horror movies.
the fact that i came three times was completely negated by the fact that he high-fived himself after.
I brought a travel sized bottle of baby powder and sprinkled it on all of the couples making out on the wall in the basement
So... remember when you threw an orange in the closet when we were 16 to make wine? Just found it. Not wine.
Thank you for trusting your ovaries to me
I am naked and annoyed.
Randomize
