I fuked that chick last night and she kept saying, "oh...oh....oh", like Bill Lumberg
so what did you do?
I did the mash I did the monster mash It was a graveyard smash!
remind me not to puke in the mesh trash can tonight
She washed lettuce and peppers in the shower and proceeded to make a salad
dude i have an english essay and a bio lab due tomorow
so basically your not goin out tonight?
who said that?
You fell asleep with your fingers in my vagina. You made this a relationship.
We didn't even make it to the door before they came out saying we weren't allowed in because of last time..
Oh my Christ. I just came so hard my penis stood back up and took a bow afterwards. I need Thai food.
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
Reunion weekend was a success. Had 3 ex's inside my vag. Hat trick!
First of all you can never say anal too much. Second I now think you're a total gentleman.
Rarely has that paragraph ever been put together
We're only going to be this young and this cute but for so long. And how often is it that a pack of Albanian law students is in your house?!
His exact words were "Can I meet your vagina?" I kept wondering if he was going to try to shake hands with it...
I took out the emergency phone in the elevator and replaced it with a bottle of vodka. The game is simple, do a shot for the number of the floor you're going to. Best suggestion box tip ever.
I knew my bag made it because I could smell the fireball that spilled inside of my suitcase before it was on the luggage carousel.
I just woke up with a pair of handcuffs in my pants, can u explain this?
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