Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
NEWSFLASH - my freind is drunk and admitted that he hates having sex with dogs. should i help him or let him be??
He also left me a wonderful voice mail..... and is now asking me where the planters peanut guy is.
You should probably go find him.
So he asked me last night if I would cheer him on while he masturbated...
I was high enough to think chocolate sauce on bagel bites was a good idea
I like how you try to look sexy and just end up looking like a weird boy.
You are colorful like whore, yet adorable, like sad puppy. You need more drink.
and my attempt at hiding my drunkness from my parents included walking into the wall as soon as they let me into the house.
Sorry if this is weird, but please don't have sex in my truck. I get to be the first...
I hear fucking Christmas music. I'm going to find fucking Santa and tell him to suck a dick and shut up for the next month
I ate you ate to the whole david gray album
This is what we do on Thursday nights. Spray tans, blunts and drawing pictures of cats.
LET ME HAVE MY JUDGMENT OF OTHER PEOPLE
Girl just left one of the apts upstairs carrying a giant bottle of kahlula and a lunchable.... I feel like we could be friends
No I will not paint you for Mardi Gras in town. It is going to rain and you don't need another ID charge
Keep two things coming: nudes and puppy pictures
Randomize
