i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
Pappa wants mamma naked
time for a it's-monday-night-and-this-week-is-gunna-suck-drink.
its friday night, im aone in my apartment and eating 2 year expired canned fruit, naked. i'm not single or anything..
Were you paying girls to come up and grab my cock and tell me I look like bradley Cooper?
When I told him he could take naked pics of me, did I really need to specify that he could not email them to my brother's friends for bragging rights?
I can smell the sangria seeping out of my pores
Is it bad that I'm a 32 year old woman that is so afraid of commitment that a hamster is too much responsibility?
Well, you're 18 and dating a 28 year old. Who has a wife. Who isn't you. I would guess that's why your mom frowns upon the relationship.
IT IS NICKEL SHIT NIGHT
*shot. Why
I dunno what's worse, that one guy here said he'd blow somebody for Tim Horton's right now, or that someone else looks like they want to test his sincerity.
Come get me, I'm fucking scared.
Woo is fucking right, dude. Vodka night tonight. Honestly, every night pretty much seeems like vodka night lately. My liver wants to move out of my body like I gave it an eviction notice.
I got up and left his place at 3am because I remembered I had a burrito in my car.
Promise me if ever I think I can't do anything, remind me that I waxed my own butthole
Idk, I know when I drink vodka my bi side comes out and I just want to make out with a girl
Randomize
