I have a walk of shame I should be getting to. "Hey, by the way, what is your name?" is not a conversation I want to have today
you started whispering 'the itsy bitsy spider' while you were putting your hands up my shorts.
Can we comment on the fact that at five thirty this morning, security woke me up in the hotel lobby, in my underwear, and some random guys winter coat?
her and i fucked to a michael jackson song and she had it memorized so she squealed every time he did
Slutapocalypse this thursday. Invite every freshieee you hooked up with this semester to my house. Think of it like a meet n greet for them and battle of the sluts for us.
just heard a glass bottle fall in lecture and my first thought was to yell party foul.....is it friday yet?
I'm going to see if it catches on fire again, then I'll make the decision.
I thought that u needed a break due the fact that your nipples were bleeding
I'm chatting with a girl missing a front tooth. I find it quite distracting. I'm sure you have deduced what bar I'm drinking in on this monday night.
Again??? Now we can't ever fucking go there again STOP PEEING IN FOYERS
But it's ok cause then I turned my tequila blanket into a tequila comforter and I felt no pain
i cant believe we used adam and eve as a sexting theme last night
Fuck off I wasn't that drunk. I was still able to toss froot loops in the air and catch them in my mouth.
And in your bra. It was quite entertaining.
Her hookup left his underwear and shorts in the dorm last night... What he was wearing when he left, we may never know.
It's amazing what a couple of orgasms can do for a girls demeanor.
Randomize
