You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
Please don't tell anyone I peed on your wall.
I put it into a sports analogy for him: there are three teams in the league- friends, fuck buddies, and dating, and the fuck buddies roster is full, pick an alternate team
Nothing says I have a hang over like telling your boss to "eat your shit"
i yelled out "tuesday" during orgasim. he fucked me into 2 days from now.
After a certain blood-alcohol level, the dog is in charge.
he fell down during beer pong and the chick told him to rub the sand out of his pussy and suck it up. i am in love
I'm venturing to your corner of this sin house in t minus 2 minutes.
my spring break was before theirs and i literally fed him vodka all week, only stopping for class and bowls. like handles. i cant even think anymore, that chastity belt was hard to get off,
I've noticed we have slowly begun to phase the "B" out of our Bromance.
We met some guy at the beach, and dug a hole with him. He invited us to "come back at night and smoke a blunt in this hole"
Hey. It's Michael. The guy that had his tongue in your mouth last night. Just wanted to check in with you.
If you find me in the bathroom in a fetal position, licking frozen bacon .. I might have Drank a little too much.
Btw, how did you break into my room, and why did you decide that covering the mushrooms with a blanket was more secure than a lock on my door?
I had sex while watching Lord of the Rings last night. I think I just reached a new level of nerd.
Randomize
