proudest moment: just made a guy walk into a parked car with his mouth hanging open cause of the shirt im wearing.
Think about all of the events that have led to this: me sitting in the back of my classroom drinking beer out of a taco bell cup, telling the teacher I have to leave early to go to an AA meeting.
I woke up at 2 in my clothes with a defrosted steak in my pocket, no drinky this week at all.
winter break is going to suck... i have to put away my college personality and transform into who my parents think i am.
We're friends. And when I drunkenly send u a pic of my left testicle i would appreciate a response.
I bought a zebra print bikini, I'm gonna be honest here- if he doesn't want to have sex with me in this, he's gay.
I mean this holiday was built on cheap beer, shitty whisky, and processed meat... and I fully plan to honor that
I rocked my own world, he was just a prop.
Dude, I brought the fucking tequila to that party and they cheered for the chick that seriously only brought limes.
YES please come visit. Lets go get belligerent. I won't even pepperspray you
Let us bow our heads and pray that I don't throw up in the tub
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
I might have been the first person in 2015 to throw up on a yellow cab before climbing in it.
sarah's view on last night: a threesome to make things less awkward. oh, well done.
Her hand jobs are magic. They smell like vanilla and awesomeness. She made me forget how to walk
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