Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
so i stopped by cvs on the way home this morning, turns out hallmark doesnt make an im sorry my friend puked on your friend card, call me if were still speaking
yay, now i'm not the only homewrecker.
yeah but i stopped sleeping with him after i found out he was married.
Just spent five minutes taking pictures of my hands for some random guy.
Thanks for reminding me why I talk about you behind your back. Get laid.
You asked the officer if he could bring you to the same jail as T.I.
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
her face looked like how i feel after Taco Bell
you got thrown out for pissing in a cup in the corner. you told one guy it was okay because you went to college and that he wouldn't understand
bitch got booty called while we were making out. and then she actually left.
I HAVE stop dating guys for their prescriptions, you have no idea how awkward family dinner was. Thank god for his xanax.
The bachelorette started when I opened the door and they threw a few dozen dildos at me.
Walked into a bathroom stall to pop an addy for my three back-to-back finals today. Felt like Clark Kent walking into a phonebooth.
I'm pretty sure I just orgasmned my way out of paying for that weed
Just waxed 95% of the hair off my vag. If he doesn't enjoy this tonight, you will, whether you like it or not.
We turned his nipples into a drinking game.
Randomize
