If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
My cat gives me a boner
I wish life was like dora the explorer where dancing pigs appear out of nowhere to solve your problems for you
wicked high...have munchies. cherry flavor lube. problem solved.
Must be January. Theres a fat chick on an elliptical wearing khaki capris. Someone doesnt own any workout clothes
Your 'drink of the future' makes sense now- you feel it for atleast 10 hours into the future
You're just horny.
Yea, and? I appreciate you as a person too if that helps.
Hey, you gotta think, is this REALLY the penis you wanna see for the rest of your life? THINK!
So, I'm tripsitting Ruben cause he's on LSD, and he's starting to eat the chair because 'it is evil' according to him... I can't choose: should I stop him or film it?
I took so my adderall all I can do is lie on my floor and stare too hard at my hedgehog. He has 42 spines in the dark spot on his shoulder btw.
While he was gone for spring break I took his head board... I don't wanna wake up from his shenanigans for the rest of my college career.
i woke up in a bed of pop tarts
His phone started ringing when we were pulled over and he said 'hold on, this is most likely more important than you', proceeded to answer it and agree to work sunday, then hung up, looked at the cop and told him to continue.
What's the plan?
Not sure. I think I'll take a dump on his windshield.
Point in my hangover when I'm honestly not sure if I'm about to puke, or shit my pants.
Randomize
