One of my students just wrote an essay on how ninjas, like drug addicts, must realize they need help before they can get better...I gave it an A+
Update. It gets worse. A) he's done viagra and B) he wears socks at all times.
found out this morning via facebook that the guy i met last night has a wife and a baby and he took me to his apartment where he takes girls to cheat on his wife
i mean you met him at the daytona 500
He lit his shirt on fire at the bar by putting a lit cigarette in the pocket to "save for later."
Just found a keg and a mini-bike in our garage, this couldn't possibly go wrong
I promise you I could read that dogs mind, he was arguing with the other dog saying he knows how fucked up I am
you fucked my boyfriend. margarita girls night will not fix this.
my roommate just said she thinks she got a flashback or some memory of me getting hit by a car.
Also, I'm going to TRY and be casual this weekend, but really, we need to be serious about equally dividing our time between party and bullshit.
The ranger made you choose between a ticket and pouring all the beer out since it was a state park.
I've never seen you that close to tears as you poured out 30 beers.
I have to pee in a cup in the morning and they are going to say....you just peed a miller light. I'm going to hang my head in shame and say yes...yes I did.
You'll pass into the great gay beyond
Where it rains cosmopolitans and scantily clad gogo dancers of all genders direct traffic
Nothing showshows the government the middle finger more than spending your tax refund on drugs
Driving, getting head and talking to your boss on the phone is not a good combination. I nearly died
I'd give my right arm to start my period. My right arm. Thats more significant then my left.
Randomize
